Sunday, June 17, 2007

An Answer Remembered

As Christians, we are part of a long tradition of people who are intent on remembering their story, of remembering the points in our history where God has decisively and definitely acted on our behalf. This rich tradition, of course, began with the ancient Israelites who rehearsed their salvation story - the story where the Angel of Death "passed over" the Jewish firstborns killing the Egyptian firstborns, which ultimately led to their exodus from slavery - once a year at the Feast of the Passover. This was actually a law that the Lord God required of them, in order that they not forget the wonderful acts of their God.

Christians continue this tradition with the celebration of the Eucharist, which I would argue, is the central act of the church. Every time we celebrate the Eucharist, we remember the sacrifice of Christ - his broken body and his shed blood. We remember the story and we make it present once again for us. Christ also prescribed such an action when he proclaimed to his disciples: "Do this in remembrance of me."

One of the reasons that God has demanded such constant acts of remembrance is because we are forgetful people. We need to remember because it is so easy for us to forget - when we feel that God has not answered our prayers or that he has not been present to us for awhile, we quickly jump to the conclusion that he has never been there.

I think, therefore, that it is entirely helpful, and entirely biblical for that matter, to work at remembering the times in your life when God has clearly answered prayer. Such an act can increase your faith and inspire you to more prayer, though you may feel that no one is listening. In light of that, I would like to rehearse for you one of the times in my life when God most clearly and most lovingly answered my prayer.

March of 2006, Julie and I were in Kentucky, unsure of our next steps. I had been accepted to Marquette for doctoral work, but we had no provisions for tuition money. My last chance was the John Wesley Fellowship, but for various reasons, that looked very doubtful. I was scheduled to fly to Houston for an interview one Friday. At the same time, Julie was driving to Milwaukee to interview for a position. She left on Thursday morning and I had the evening to myself. With so much at stake, I decided that I had a lot of praying to do.

Around 9:00 in the evening, I headed to Asbury Seminary, about a mile from our house. I wanted to pray in a special place, which for me was Asbury's chapel, Estes Chapel. At 9:00 in the evening, I figured the place would be deserted and I would be alone with the Lord and my prayers. To my dismay however, as I approached Estes, I saw that all lights were blazing and there was some extremely loud, and rather poor, organ music emanating from the place. Disappointed and dejected, I considered turning around and heading home. Instead, I found a little prayer chapel just to the side of Estes, which I always knew was there, but in which I had never spent much time.

With the lights off, I kneeled at the small altar and began praying about all of the things that were heavy on my heart. I prayed for my wife and for her interview, for her calling in ministry and for our marriage. I prayed for my interview and my calling and for the challenges that a PhD program entailed. Finally I began to pray for the means to pay for the tuition. Knowing that the John Wesley Fellowship was unlikely, I simply began praying that the Lord's will be done. It became a refrain in my prayer: "Lord that you would provide the means to pay for this: your will be done." I remember simply repeating that phrase again and again. At one point in the prayer I looked up and caught my breath at the words engraved above the altar where I knelt:

"Thy will be done."

As most of you know, Julie got the job she interviewed for and I was fortunate enough to receive the John Wesley Fellowship, which has helped us so much this year. We often wonder how we could have done this without the Fellowship. However, I do not think that earning the Fellowship was God's answer to my prayer that night in March 2006. I believe that it was rather his words to me: "Thy will be done." Seeing those words were like God's arms around me, assuring me that he was with me in this walk. That he would not leave me. And though there have been times this year when I have forgotten - more times than I care to relate - I know that this truth remains. God is with me. God is with us.

We simply need to remember.

6 comments:

Julie said...

I am more convinced each day that this is what it means to be a Christian...just to remember. That is what God kept trying to get the Israelites to do, it is what Jesus was teaching at that first communion table, and it is what we have been struggling to do for the last 2000+ years. Thanks for reminding us to remember and to rehearse the good...

Anonymous said...

Thank you Jackson for another beautiful post, and for reminding ME, your mother, about all the graces God has extended to you in your preparation for ministry. It's sometimes easy for proud parents (how could ANYONE not love you?) to look at you and Julie and see your growth and successes as somehow YOUR doing, and the result of your perserverance, personality and intelligence. (all of which were genetically provided of course:). But actually I KNOW that God has just been paving the way, providing the resources, both internal and external, and that ALL things come from Him, even perseverance, personality and intelligence. thanks for the story of answered prayer, also a good lesson on HOW to pray and for what to pray. Thanks to God for showing you that your gift is to teach. Have a good good week!
Love, MomK p.s. I absolutely LOVE my current scripture memory verse....a new one to me.....check this out all you who are weary, burdened, confused -- worried, wondering, searching for an answer -- waiting, wanting, hoping...... did I not just include about everybody?
Lamentations 3: 21-33. Awesome words.

Kelli B said...

i just tried to post a response and it got deleted!

basically, i see that THIS is another story to be repeated. it's awesome how the Lord gives us moments in our lives where we meet Him intimatly, or when a deep truth is revealed, or we experience the Lord in a new way. And the great part is sharing that with others. It ingrains into your mind the memory and moment, the truth, and it also draws those around you into a deeper curiousity and pursuit of the Lord.

good post.

Anonymous said...

Excellent words, my friend. This prayer, as you know, is not only pertinent but crucial for me right now...well, always, but you know what I mean.

Anonymous said...

I remember a phone call from you prior to your decision to fly to Dallas for the interview. Your question to me was: "Why will it be any different this year Dad?
I still am going to Marquette!" And I said, "Jackson, there must be a reason they are inviting you back, what have you got to lose?" So, reluctantly you made the flight down and after much prayer offered up on your behalf, the committee saw the light and decided to grant you a Wesley Fellowship.

I loved the story of you praying that night. It would have been so easy to stay in your apartment or to have the Estes Chapel opened, but God wanted you in that little chapel that was intimate and he wanted to give you a sense that he was there with you. No doubt that little lift you received when you looked up, "Thy will be done" gave you a huge sense of courage that he really was with you and when you met with the committee they could see your confidence and saw the light! Praise God for his goodness.

Thanks for sharing that story, it gives me renewed hope that God wants us to know that he does answer our prayers in so many ways.

Dad

r o b said...

great post jackson. and a good word to hear. thanks!